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Tips to make you feel more confident

Updated: Aug 4, 2020

yandra vitorio toronto fashion blogger

The only way to start this post about feeling confident is to share a little bit about the times I didn't feel my best self. Growing up, I had a lot of problems with my self esteem. I didn't like my big nose, my hair, my big boobs, my weight... I'd get picked on at school and that obviously didn't help. I'd often sit in front of the mirror and cry. Even now just the thought of it, makes me want to cry. I feel sad for that 15 year old me. As a consequence, I put myself into bad relationships because I probably thought I couldn't find anything better than that. Well that couldn't be further from the truth.

The problem was that with ought even noticing, I'd put all the responsibility of feeling confident into other people. If someone paid me a compliment, I'd feel beautiful (unless if it was coming from my mom and dad lol). If someone would comment something bad about my appearance, that would just destroy me.

On another hand, the other day I was talking to one of my best friends who's always had the most beautiful body and she was telling me how she would hate her body, thought her hips were too wide or something like that. Then I thought WOW how insane! I'm not exaggerating when I say EVERYONE thought her body was beautiful, but her. Why is that? Is it society? Is it a teenager thing?

Anyways fast forward to present day, do I think I'm the most beautiful woman alive? No. Do I hate myself for my imperfections? Absolutely not! I've learned to love myself and find the beauty in the things I used to hate about myself. My nose is still big but I don't know, it's part of me, it goes with my face, my type of beauty, I couldn't imagine myself with a little nose LOL. My hair is great, strong, I'm grateful I have hair ahaha. My weight comes and goes, if I gain weight why stress about it? I believe that one of the biggest pleasures in life is to eat, to explore different cultures through their food. So I'll eat. If I need to lose weight I'll do it too. No stress. My boobs, well I love my boobies! They fed my little Theo, is there anything more amazing than that?

Ok, enough with all that pep talk. Here are my tips to feel more confident everyday:

1. SPREAD THE LOVE. Compliment other people everyday. This is my number one tip because making someone smile is such a beautiful thing. Will not only be good for the other person but will make you feel amazing!

2. WEAR IT AND FEEL IT. Wear things that make you feel good about yourself. No matter what's in or out of fashion, if you love wearing a yellow blazer with emojis all over it, why not? Also, keep your house clean and organised. This is a huge deal, people! Being in an environment that's fresh, clean and smells good will help you feel your best self too.

3. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. Rather it comes in the form of bubble baths, face masks, dance parties by yourself in front of the mirror, going to the gym of even for a walk outside, cooking a nice meal while you're listening to classical music and having some wine of a Tuesday night or even reading that book you promised yourself you would but "never have time".

4. BE SILLY. Don't take yourself too seriously and smile often even if you don't want to. This study shows that smiling often can trick your brain into happiness and that the mere act of smiling can lift your mood, lower stress, boost your immune system and possibly even prolong your life. The fact is, as Dr. Isha Gupta a neurologist from IGEA Brain and Spine explains, a smile spurs a chemical reaction in the brain, releasing certain hormones including dopamine and serotonin. So just smile!!

5. KNOW THAT YOU ALREADY ARE A QUEEN. This is the most important one. It means you have to silence the noise, who cares about what other people say? YOU ARE WORTH IT!

Books I recommend:

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